Kaliyuga Karna

Karna, the great hero of 'Mahabharata', lived such a life that he became another name for generosity.

We have heard stories from B R Chopra, that once a disguised Indra approached Karna and asked for his kavacha (body armour) and kundala (earrings) as alms. After 2 minutes of camera shifting from one person to another and some long boring song, Karna readily gave them away, cutting the armor and earrings off his body. There used to be some emotion called “Shame” during those days. Indra, felt that emotion seeing the generosity of Karna. He reciprocated by giving Karna the boon to use his most powerful weapon (no not Rohypnol, the date rape drug), but the Vasavi Shakti. 

In today’s age if there is someone who can be compared with Karna’s generosity, its our own Yeddy (as said always, he hates being called Yeddy). When it comes to generosity, Yeddyurappa beats all odds.

We have seen how generous he can be when splurging the state’s wealth,

1. buying cycles at double the cost
2. buying damaged sarees from neighboring states at double the money
3. letting iron ore slip out through our borders into neighboring states and into coffers of miners
4. distributing wealth in buying MLAs
5. sponsoring Nitin Gadkari’s son’s big fat wedding
6. opening up states treasury to mutts and other religious organizations
7. etc, etc, etc, etc, etc……

We have also seen his generosity in recognizing contribution to the country. Recently, after the Indian cricket team won the world cup, Yeddy generously expressed his appreciation by announcing gifting of precious pieces of real estate.

"It is a joyous occasion for the entire country. We are proud of the Indian cricket team for winning the World Cup after 28 years. In recognition of their achievement, the state government will gift free sites measuring 372 square metres (4,000 square feet) in Bangalore soon to all the 15 cricketers," a beaming Yeddyurappa told reporters.

He then went a step ahead and announced that the coaching staff lead by Gary Kirsten would also get this token of appreciation.

His detractors did not appreciate his act of generosity though, which was expected as even Karna was not the most loved character of B R Chopra’s epic. Some idiots even go on to question if Gary Kirsten would build a house in Bangalore, shift his family from the plush locales of South Africa to bear the horrible traffic, bad road, diminishing tree line of Bangalore. For that matter, would Sachin Tendulkar or MS Dhoni shift to Bangalore. But logic is not something that appears in ‘Generosity’ dictionary. That’s all the thing of past now.

We have recently heard that Yeddy is having discussions with is close friend and fellow lover of Bangalore, Obama. Yeddy wants to organize a valedictory function for the Navy seals, who bravely fought in Pakistan and contributed towards humanity. Yeddy wants to honour them with real estate. His deputy Ashoka has already identified small pieces of land in Bangalore for the same. Below is the list of some illegal occupancies identified for immediate acquirement towards this. 

1. Lal Bagh
2. Cubbon Park
3. Race course
4. Chinnaswamy stadium
5. Kanteerava stadium
6. Golf course
7. Vidhana soudha
8. Bannerghata national park
9. Electronic city
10. ITPL

The list is longer and is beyond the scope of this article. The navy seals are expected to arrive in stealth aircrafts to avoid the ‘Ragi ball missiles’ thrown by Deve Gowda family.

Yeddy is pulling all strings to ensure that this is a very successful event. All roads in Bangalore will be dug up and re-laid. All gutters in Bangalore will be refurbished and all foot path will be dug up again and re-cemented. All the MLAs (both purchased and the ones who were already sold) have finally some job to do. An estimated 10,000 crores would be spent on this program.

That’s the least Yeddy can do for few guys who have done so much to humanity through Project Geronimo (during the years of search this was called Project Finding Nemo). Who else could be so generous enough other than our Yeddy. 

I doubt if Karna would have been so generous. If Karna was around now, he would have transferred the ‘Generosity’ crown to Yeddy. We could soon see zillions of posters on every nook and corner of Karnataka, on buses, on autos, etc calling him ‘Kaliyuga Karna’.